Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
you told grandpa to call you daddy
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize