remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
