I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
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He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize