How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
The air was thick with penises
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
