Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
