i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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