oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
