Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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