I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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