She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
