You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Randomize
