dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
