im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
is this the sara with the beer cane?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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