she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Everyone says I win the strip club
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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