what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
