Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize