There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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