very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
