Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
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I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
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The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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