Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
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