DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize