pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize