So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
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I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
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I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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