Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
