; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
