Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
