thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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