I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
