I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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