took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize