So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize