we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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