I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
