She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
