You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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