I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
pop tarts are not kleenex
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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