How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
My ass is underappreciated
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
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