don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize
