For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
