There is no way he is gay with that hair.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
