She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
