I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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