The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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