Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
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