I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Randomize