I think scott just propositioned me for sex
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
