thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
