Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
