HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize