She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
